So as some of you may know My beautiful wife Heather and I are on the nest. After one miscarriage a little over a year ago we are cautiously optimistic about this pregnancy.
Speaking for myself, I am bothered by the fact that almost everyone in our lives are trying to impose their beliefs on our future child ranging from one end of the spectrum like cloth diapers to the other like Circumcision. People are telling us we are wrong because “That’s not how everyone else does it” or “Just in case” and so on, and so on. People instead should be asking things like “Did you do the research?” “What seems to be the best thing to do for you and your child taking into account all the available facts?” or even a simple “Why?”. Just a lot of No, No, No, my way is better just because.
I am by nature a non-confrontational person, so when the topics of natural water birth, cloth diapers, breast feeding, religion, christening, and Circumcision come up I do not wish to debate people on these issues but sometimes I offer links to different places where people can get more information on a particular subject, but that’s about it. On the inside I want to scream something like “Do the research! Then get back to me.” or (if my blood sugar happens to be low) my internal monolog is more likely to be “Are you F*&#ing stupid!?”. Rest assured that on the outside I am perfectly calm.
This “Baby Burdge” as we are calling it, is the most important thing in both mine and Heather’s lives right now, and I suspect for the rest of our lives as well. If you know us at all you would know we are working tirelessly to make sure we make the best decisions on everything from what type of safety devices to have around the house to how will will best raise this new Human. We are making a person, how cool is that?
I am very lucky to have found a person to spend my life with that respects me as much as I respect her. Heather and I do not always agree on everything, but we always agree to listen to each others opinions and also listen to all the facts we want to share with each other. I have learned a lot from Heather and she’s learned some from me too, believe it or not. I suspect that is one of the reasons I married her 😀 (I really love her, just sayin’) .
Who am I as a person? Why and how do I make my decisions? I am a man of Science. I am a man of Logic. I am a compassionate man. I am a loving Husband and soon to be Father. I must know Why in every situation Why on every subject that crosses my path.
I learned a long time ago, I’d say about the age of ten that if listened to everyone around me There was an Easter Bunny and all the Easter baskets sold at the store were there for no reason, or that there is a magical person who would somehow know that I had lost a tooth and would make it a point to sneak in my bedroom that exact night and exchange my let’s face it worthless used tooth for what I think the going rate back then was about 25¢ US. Or maybe a cupid would shoot me threw the heart or I might find a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow if I chased vertically challenged people dressed in green around, or there was and old man in the sky with a beard and sandals that watched me while I was masturbating as a teenager (the alternative to the body’s natural function is an external emission, which is way too messy) just so I wouldn’t get into a special club after I was dead. And a man dressed up like a Coca-Cola add from the early 20th century would travel all around the world replacing all the toys your parents bought you by working two jobs for three months to pay for with the exact same toys right before Christmas morning seems to me a bit… ok, I’ll say it…unrealistic. There I said it and I feel better.
Where do these horrible stories come from? My guess is maybe these and other myths are an ultimate evolution of the camp fire story. Stories that would be told generation after generation. After generation, after generation… x∞. These stories are still being told to our children because that is what our parents told us. There is no problem in having fun and entertaining stories and traditions. The problem is when the parents tell these things to their children as facts instead stories, that is called lying. Even worse is when the parents themselves believe thees things to be facts (but that’s another show).
So why do I bring up the evolution of Human Mythos? Because this pattern is not only present in the main examples I’ve talked about above, but in almost every little “Wives’ Tale” or “I heard”‘s or “Some one I Know…” all those are just a perpetuation of lies or ignorance. Most of the reason people do what they do now a days is because of this. A lot of people do what “Everyone else does” because they fail to want or care about their life enough to simply ask “Why?” … and then of course go and indeed learn why.
Heather and I have talked a lot of things over and have agreed on the following; Our baby will be born at Baby Love Birth Center , Boy or Girl the child will not be Circumcised, Heather will breast feed Baby Burdge, We will use cloth diapers, we will let our child pick it’s own religion if any, we will not preform any religious ceremony such as In India, they toss them off buildings or in Spain, every May 25th since 1620, the Baby-Jumping Colacho Festival features men dressed as Satan who jump over rows of infants (like an Olympic hurdler) to keep the devil away from the babes, or in the United States the most popular christening where a baby is indoctrinated into a faith not of his or her own choosing. And most importantly, even though it hurts me to say this Baby Burdge will have the right to choose between Star Trek and Star Wars.
So the moral of this little story is this… Our baby is OUR baby. You may help us, support us, encourage us and be there for us. If we have made a dissension it is not based on folklore or hearsay but it is based on Heather and I making the best decision we can possibly make with all the available information we can get our hands on. Will we make mistakes? Sure, we all do, nobody is perfect, But it wont be because we didn’t try to be the best parents we can be to our tiny little life form. OK I am hoping the baby picks Star Trek… But is up to them.
Thanks for listening.
Albie