Cousin Eddie

It was a fifteen hour drive to Raliegh NC for Heather’s grandfather’s 75th birthday and Steers family reunion. I was very scared to take the trip. I don’t like leaving my little corner of the world. But for Heather I would do anything. The drive was over 800 miles. I do not recommend driving that much in one day. I got white line fever. The first night we were staying with her uncle Glen and aunt Karen. When we got to their place around 1:30 and I was falling asleep. Their house is the most beautiful house I’ve ever seen in real life, If I ever won the lottery I don’t think I could even conceve of building a place this gorgeous. I felt like cousin Eddie from National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation. It is so nice to stay here but it makes me feel so bad about how I live my life in poverty without even realizing it. I thought I was a Chevy Case and it turns out I’m a Randy Quaid.

Chancellor Durken: I will have to say: This morning, I was the leader of the universe as I know it. This afternoon, I’m only a voice in a chorus. But I think it was a good day.

My name is not Quaid.